Nothing Special

Some random thoughts from other people. Blame a certain person in Miami Beach for my addiction to twitter.

He took the words right out of my mouth.

Can I just say in very non-polite terms.

FUCK YOU MCCONNELL AND THE HORSE YOU RODE IN ON.

In other bits and pieces, I follow Martina Navratilova on twitter. I was with my mum last weekend and I had to watch TV. Well, Martina was a guest on an Irish show and she was damn magnificent.

The best part was where she said….Mueller…save us.

I love her.


My daughter is currently in Vietnam. I went into her room to collect empty cups etc and imagine my surprise when I saw a copy of Anthony Bourdain’s “Kitchen Confidential.”


Crippled son is down south sending me pics of the heatwave and telling lies about his whereabouts.


Surfer dude has disappeared from the planet…he is the fellow who went surfing during a hurricane.


Ali is out the back baking herself.


Why oh why did I agree to ahost a  party for 40 rowers next week?

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I Can’t Even Blog Anymore – Trump Has Ruined The World

Beautiful eurasian, common magpie, european bird, pica pica, isolated, watercolor illustration on white

Beautiful eurasian, common magpie, european bird, pica pica, isolated, watercolor illustration Aon white background

At least I have Maggie.

In other news, we have a heat wave in Ireland. The fecking roads are melting.

I managed to persuade hubby to go to the beach. It was a riot.  Some Eastern Europeans went in for a dip in their underwear. When they tried to traverse the pebbly beach, they realised their underwear was transparent.

Then, I surreptitiously walked down to the water and peed in the pebbly sand…what can I say….needs must.

As I was urinating in the Irish Sea, I heard a dog barking and thought WTF.

Sure enough there was a full scale rescue going on. Some mad mutt had swum out for miles and all of a sudden wasn’t happy.

I forgot to mention that they brought the dog back on a surfboard. The dog loved it and came back to a standing ovation. Woofing all the way.

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Welcome To America

welcome

I want to rid the world of this menace. That is the nicest way I can portray my murderous thoughts.

I need to calm down.

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I’m Not Being PC Anymore

 

So, I asked him this.

 

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Oh The Horror, The Horror Of It All

 

My friends, I am going to tell you a story. My grandmother ( I never met her) went to the US around 1905 and stayed sometime into the late 1920s. On one visit home, she met her future husband and decided to return to Ireland to marry him. She had a little money from her sojourn abroad and when she got married, they bought a car. This was unheard of in Ireland at the time. Of course it was in the middle of some very troubled times in our Emerald Isle when people were on different sides of a political divide and it was a common occurrence for my grandfather to be woken up in the middle of the night at gunpoint and ordered to drive a member of the opposing faction down to West Cork for an ambush or maybe just a meeting. This is just setting the background…bear with me.

When my mother was four, her father got sick. They didn’t really know what was wrong with him.  They extracted all of his teeth and later discovered that he had a brain tumour. He died.

My grandmother had no choice but to go out and work for the “gentry.” She had to live with them and was not able to return home at nights or the weekends. She was just gone.

So in one fell swoop, my mother lost both her parents. She was fortunate enough to have an aunt and uncle who took her in and looked after her while her mother worked and they were very good to her.

But, at the age of four, my mother had a nervous breakdown.

Her parents were gone.


I don’t want anyone to tell me that what that bastard Trump is doing is not going to scar these babies, toddler and older children for life. My mother is ninety one and she still talks about the trauma of what happened.


If I lived on 5th Avenue and I saw that fat turd walking towards me…there is no telling what I would do. At the very least I would hawk up a good blob of  phlegm and hurl it in his direction. At the very least…


FUCK YOU TRUMP. AND FUCK THE GOP FOR ALLOWING THIS TO HAPPEN.

I don’t use this word lightly, because I hate it. But as far as I am concerned, they are all a pack of treasonous CUNTS.

 

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May Trump Rot In Hell For This

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Bill Maher Nails It

 

Also and too…remember my stories about Maggie the magpie, her crippled leg and her new-found toyboy.

Well, I went down the garden today to inspect our newly installed shed and I heard a bit of a ruckus on the roof. Imagine my delight as I peered heavenwards to find Maggie, toyboy and three baby magpies on my chimney.

Life doesn’t get much better than that. And fuck the rats, I am going to throw more bread on the roof. Don’t tell my husband.

Also and too…this can get repetitive I know!

At 10.30 this morning, I went into my neighbour’s house to invite her in for a cup of tea. That lazy woman was in bed. Her husband let me in and went upstairs to wake her up. Now to be fair, she is 78 and plays more golf than trump. She came downstairs in her dressing gown and I said to her – come in an look at my new shed. I knew that would entice her. I’m in my dressing gown she said. I said – who cares. She said, ok. Just give me a minute. So I gave her a minute and she came downstairs in her dressing gown and a very enticing shade of lipstick. Even her husband laughed and men don’t notice these things.

The sun is shining and we sit on the patio. It had rained last night and the chairs were a bit wet so I threw a couple of towels on them that she had given me years ago. We are neighbours and nothing goes to waste…

I still have the rotating Xmas cake tin that she gave me .

Anyway, four hours later, she exits my house. We had discussed everything under the sun. She is still in her dressing gown, but the lipstick had lost its gloss. I live on a very busy road. People would notice someone wandering around in their night clothes because the traffic can be at a stand still.

At this stage, I am starving and need sustenance so I walk down to the local shop to buy cigarettes. I did the same walk yesterday and happened to meet a lovely young man who works in the shop. He does the vaping thing and I asked him about it. We had a lengthy discussion and he promised to give me more info on it.

So…I am walking back to the house, armed with coleslaw and cigarettes and I see someone walking against me surrounded by a plume of smoke. As we got closer, we both recognized each other and we literally fell around the place laughing. He was vaping and heading off to work in the shop.

He is a student and he is damn gorgeous. He wears his hair in a bun and has perfect teeth.

That has been my Saturday so far.

 

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