Suggested Meditations For Sarah Palin’s New Book

Sarah Palin is picking herself up and dusting off all of that mud that she has been dragged through lately.

According to the latest news, Sarah, that silver-tongued devil is writing another tome for the rednecks to slather over.

Former Alaska governor Sarah Palin signed a deal with Regnery Publishing to write Sweet Freedom: A Devotional. The faith-based book is scheduled for mid November, just in time for Christmas.

The devotional will feature 260 meditations–one for almost every day of the year (?!?)ย –that explore and apply biblical principles to the pressing topics of our time.

I have some suggestions…

  • Sweet Jesus – how many more babbies is Bristol going to have? Give me strength.
  • Dear Lord – why did you take Dakota away from me? I lay myself prostate before you.
  • Holy Christ – I know we made a holy show of ourselves at that party with the kids and Todd, and I am also mea culpa ( another Latin word for you theri) or is it Greekin? But peace man peace.
  • Father Most High – (not Creepy Chuck), deliver me from the embarrassment of the Iowa speech. It wasn’t my fault. And theย fuckin repubes threw me to the wolves. I just know that small, perky Judd woman was laughing her ass off. Just mediaite! It’s like bichram yoga…
  • Son of Mary – Bristol and I also conceived without sin. We have a lot in common with your mum. We need to talk some time.
  • The Trinity – Fox and Tapp are now on myย shit list, forever and ever, Amen.
  • Oh Holy One, my PAC is leaking like my Belmonts on a hot day. Pray for us.
  • Oh God – Bristol is very religious. She prays every single night with her boyfriends and calls out your name. Sometimes the debicel level gets too much and we have to tell her to tone it down. God can hear you we tell her – no need to roar.

My bent back is straightening and I am reaching for the lord and the dollars. Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!

That’s all I got. ๐Ÿ™‚

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14 Responses to Suggested Meditations For Sarah Palin’s New Book

  1. 40Watt says:

    Coffee Break Meditations: 260 Devotions for the Workplace
    by Edward Grube

    Is there some significance to the number 260 that I know nothing about or are there a lot of folk confused about how many days there are in a year?

    This fellow Grube has written a load of books on various devotional themes and, as far as I can tell, he has a background that qualifies him to so do. If I were him, I’d keep a close eye on Palin’s (or Nancy’s) output for incidences of plagiarism.

    My advice to Sarah is rather to borrow copiously from you Irishgirl. I know you are generous enough to share. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    • Trish says:

      For Edward Grube, it makes sense. He specifically stated they were for the workplace, which is typically 5 days/week. Since Sarah doesn’t understand a work week, I’m not sure why she chose 260.

  2. irishgirl999 says:

    Yes, 40 Watt. I am a generous soul.

  3. irishgirl999 says:

    And a god-fearing one at that!

  4. Venefica says:

    She should pay you for those, IG. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    But, Sweet Jeebus! Regnery thinks she wrote “I Hope Like Heck: The Selected Poems of Sarah Palin”!!! It’s a parody e-book! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Hope_Like_Heck

    And note that their press release also, too, says she, “provides political commentary on Fox News.” Nah nah nah nah nah!

    • irishgirl999 says:

      It tells you all you need to know about the conservative, christian right.

      Fucking dimwits. Sorry about my French. ๐Ÿ˜‰

      I’m not the least bit sorry!

    • 40Watt says:

      I can’t believe Regnery fell for that! Sweet Jeebus indeed!

      As Solomon writes in his foreword, “Verse, like America, yearns to be free. Few 21st-century poets understand this better than Sarah Palin. Not since Walt Whitman first heard America singing has a writer captured the hopes and dreams of her people so effortlessly โ€“ and with so many gerunds.” Indeed.

      Example:

      I may be pretty wimpy
      About this family stuff,
      But I feel like I’m at the breaking point
      With the hurtful gossip about my family
      That Sherry
      And others
      Get away with.
      Bear with me.
      I hate this part of the job
      And many days
      I feel like it’s not worth it
      When they have to put up with the hate
      That spews from people like Sherry.
      And there are others.

      Then there is the tour de force which gives name to the slim volume.
      I Hope Like Heck
      Also,
      When asked about the Gravina Bridgeโ€”
      I hope like heck
      Lawmakers are smart enough
      To chop that out
      Of the state budget
      So I don’t have to.

      http://www.theguardian.com/books/booksblog/2011/jun/22/poetry-sarah-palin-emails

  5. MrsGunka says:

    You did good IG. I’m proud of you! You wrote it in a language she can understand! ๐Ÿ™‚ It just proves she doesn’t understand a thing in the bible or thoughts of meditations. Bet she thinks it’s 260 medications for her next year. The “feel good” kind!

  6. irishgirl999 says:

    Bed time for me now. That old hoar has worn me out.

  7. Pete says:

    Sarah had to publish a “ghost written” book geared to Christians. Her political clout is gone and these are the only people left who are stupid enough to buy what the grifter is selling!! Evangelicals love to throw their money away, The 700 club, Oral Roberts, etc etc. It was just a matter of time until Sarah was forced to horde in on the fundie market. She’s got nothing left!

  8. Scarsdale says:

    Bristles is now urging people to “burn their welfare checks instead of the flag” May not be too long before this little walking STD is applying for a welfare check. I really do not see a future for her in Marina’s porn business. Sarah Pac reportedly only took in $50,000 this session. The grift is drying up finally.

  9. Scarsdale says:

    I just thought of the perfect name for Bristles when she joins Marina;s porn site – ORAL Palin!!

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